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Hello

  • Sep. 15th, 2009 at 11:40 AM

Ok let me introduce myself. My name is Alice but I hate my name and everyone calls me Al or Allie. Ive been dealing with bulimia nervosa since i was 8 when my mum moved out. I thought maybe she left because I wasnt a good enough daughter. I started going on crazy binges because food became a comfort to me. but then i noticed i was gaining weight and my dad kept making fun of me, so i would exercise and play like crazy . I did this every few days until i was 11. then at school one day I heard one girl talking about how she found her older sister sticking her fingers down her throat. and they were saying that it made you skinny. So that night I tried it and haven'ts topped since. I have lost a lot of weight but my body is in terrible condition. I can see myself deteriorating each day but i can't stop. I also restrict myself to 700 calories a day, but i still purge it. I have nobody to talk to because my friends all have perfect bodies and lives and my dad would just laugh and think i was stupid if i told him. Id love to talk to some of the girls on this site because i feel so alone with my issues and I hate it
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Sep. 15th, 2009

  • 11:25 AM

First journal entry!! Shames its going to be a bitchy one. I took another day off school because of my throat today. My dad doesn't even notice or care about my health. he thinks i just fake it half the time, and even when i make it really obvious that i'm sick (not just physically) he doesn't notice. I told him that i was thikning about moving out and flatting next year and he laughed and said that my flatmates would be lucky and that they'll never have any food in the house with me around. I think he knows that I binge but he doesn't know what I do afterwards. and if he does, he hasn't mentioned it. I feel like jumping on a plane and going to live with mumexcept i cant because shes more of a bitch than dad is. I need to stop spending so much of my money on crap and actualy start saving it
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allieladybird

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